"I'LL SHOW YOU MINE IF YOU SHOW ME YOURS: CLEO BACHELOR OF THE YEAR" Goes to Adelaide Force and Olyroo star defender, Ivan 'Look Sharon isn't he cute' Zelic, for this week wowing the young nymphets in the City of Churches and making it to the final of this year's Cleo Most Eligible Bachelor Awards. The criteria that Ivan 'I'm to sexy for my jock-strap' Zelic had to meet to make the final is unclear but it is believed that a rating out of 10 for… · Making Love with Your Socks on It's great to see a young Olyroo flying the flag (or his dirty underwear) for Aussie soccer. April 2000
Goes to the NSL coach who is as funny as Premier, Steve Bracks telling Victorians they can't turn their air conditioners on when it's a stinking 40 degrees Celsius, Adelaide Force's, Zoran Matic who gave us a philosophical, metaphysical Zen moment after his team thumped Brisbane Strikers 6-2 last weekend… In apparent reference to his team's improved form Matic, the chook lover, explained… "When a blind chicken finds some food on the ground, it is because it is trying all the time" Mad? You be the judge. Rumour has it this week that Matic is prepared to enter the player's transfer market and pay a record fee for Plucka Duck, Foghorn Leghorn, the Chicken Hawk and Miss Prissy… December 2002
Goes to the man who is about as funny as a Russian Finance Minister with a Budget Deficit, Adelaide Force coach, Zoran Matic. When replying to Brisbane Striker's coach, John Kosmina's claim that his side was 'predictable', Matic fired back - 'Does anyone ever take any notice of what John Kosmina has to say? The only predictable thing is how often we beat his teams." Well said Zoran, but I think now is a good time to get out of town. October 1999
Goes to the pride of South Australia, the revamped Adelaide Force Soccer Club for their humiliating Round 1 loss to perennial cellar dweller, the Canberra Cosmos 3-0 in the country's capital last weekend. Force coach and forever the jokester, Zoran Matic lamented after the debacle…. "We played stupidly…we got a lesson." Perhaps it was the belated lesson that the humble Russian tennis ace, the 'Mouth from Moscow', Yevgeny Kalfelinkov was suppose to give to our Leyton Hewett and couple of weeks ago. October 1999
Goes to Adelaide City coach and 'Boris Yeltsin's love child reincarnate, Zoran Matic, after his charges tragically lost in injury time 2-1 last week against the 'juiced-up' Perth Glory in the land of the swarming Sandgroper. The heartbreaking loss effectively ended the Zebra's season and condemned 'Iron Curtain' Matic back to the drawing board. What compounded the pain for Matic and his men was the thought of Glory coach, Bernd Stange, who after the memorable contest said; "Today's game didn't have a loser!" Matic reportedly retorted (we think): "If winners are grinners why am I not grinning…. OK, OK I never grin, but that's another matter". May 1999
Goes to Adelaide City coach, Zoran Matic for roundly publicly bagging his players after his team earned a disappointing draw against South Melbourne last weekend. On Adelaide City's goal ace, Damien Mori, Matic said…. "He doesn't do enough, he just makes a sprint every 5 minutes." On his team, Matic said… "We have never improved a result in my time here. When the other team loses a player, we immediately get more bludgers." December 1998 |
