‘What are a few perceived errors amongst friends’ Award

Goes to the a Brazilian referee who was suspended last season by his national federation amid accusations of bribery and incompetence yet was appointed as match referee by FIFA for the England versus USA game in the 2010 World Cup.

Carlos Eugênio Simon is the whistleblowers name and his crime in the Brazilian competition? A catalogue of ‘perceived errors’.

So bad were the ‘perceived errors’ that president of Palmeiras Luiz Gonzaga Belluzzo went on a public rant in the Rio Times…..

"He's a crook, a scoundrel ... just a shameless bastard," he said. "He must be in someone's pocket. If I met him in the street, I would slap him. What he did was unbelievable and he was helping Fluminense. He should be driven out of football."

A FIFA World Cup spokesperson in unconfirmed and totally unsubstantiated reports justified the appointment by saying “Bribery? Incompetence? Perceived errors? Sounds like the qualities of a good referee to me.”

'Liverpool are my team' Award

Goes to former England manager Sven Goran Eriksson, who on Rafa Benitez’s termination at Liverpool, has declared, to the world, that he is, in fact, amongst many other things, a life-long Reds fan.

‘I’ve always loved Liverpool. Ever since I was a little kid growing up in Sweden I’ve had posters of all the great Liverpool players on my wall…..Bobby Charlton, Nobby Stiles, Dennis Law ....yes great Liverpool players who shaped what I am today.....what’s that? Manchester United? Oh yeh I also like them too.....isn’t their manager Sam Allardyce retiring soon? Hey Tord where's my CV?” said Sven in unconfirmed reports.