Giving Samurais the Blues

Japan had been the undisputed powerhouse of the Asian Confederation right up until the Socceroos rattled and then rolled them in Germany at the 2006 World Cup.

The Socceroos, who would be changing Confederations after the tournament, thus signalled their intent to shake things up in the region. Unfortunately for Japan, Australia scares them and there’s something about Tim Cahill, in particular, that messes with their samurai warrior super cool, maybe it’s the mega tatt on his arm or the damage he does to the corner flag every time he scores against them, which is quite often.

Emotionally and historically, China also troubles them and one their  heroes who has retired from international football,  Shunsuke Nakumura of Celtic has never quite been the same since the team bus left without him a few years ago when they played China away. In fact, he still doesn’t order the chicken and cashews or speak with the team manager. For the record, North Korea is also a worry for them, but that’s a geo-political thing.

Japan has increasingly presented a brand of football as mesmerising and technically adept as that of a Teppanyaki chef’s prowess behind the hotplate. And like said chef, they perhaps spend far too much time stuffing around rather than making sure the diners actually get what they paid for.

While the country has furnished legends like Hideotoshi Nakata who was the first to play in Italy, Nakumura formerly of Celtic and now pretty boy Keisuke Honda who plies his trade with CSKA Moscow, Japan’s problem is that it just has not produced any strikers worth their weight in whale. Indeed, there is one school of thought that has argued that it was high time the nation directed some legitimate scientific research towards putting the ball in the back of the net instead.

At the last Asian Cup, such was the tension at the penalty shoot out in their Quarter final-revenge clash against Australia that then coach, Ivica Osim had to retreat to the dressing room as he feared his heart could not take the pressure. Fortunately for both Japan and Ivica, the country managed to slot home the winner. Japan’s pursuit of a third straight Asian Cup ended when it went down to South Korea in the semi final on penalties. It was also at that point that the nation finally understood that it did better in shoot outs when Ivica wasn’t watching.

Unfortunately for Ivica, the roller coaster ride of managing the most emotionally contained nation when you yourself have anger management issues did lead to a stroke and some time in a coma while in the top job. It then got awkward for the whole nation as it sumo wrestled with the moral dilemma of sacking him while he was coming in and out of consciousness imploring their Brazilian born player Tulio, to “go for the top corner.”  Such was the nation’s resolve however, that they did let him down gently, though to this day he still thinks he’s the gaffer.

Japan, nonetheless, is a very good, tidy unit who, as far as precision passing and precision hair sculpting go, can resemble Italy on a good day; though, unlike the latter and to its credit, does tend to run with a bit more intensity and attack the ball for the full 90. It’s perhaps no surprise then and maybe it was even their destiny that they employed Italian legend Zaccheroni to coach their national team after the 2010 World Cup. For this reason, the Blue Samurais can be a threat as they are able to exert enough pressure from midfield on any backline to get the job done.

This Asian Cup has seen them get off to a slow start, slowly gather momentum and even showing some real resolve to claw out victories. Maybe the hidden moral there is that they should eat more crab. The fact that they pumped Saudi Arabia 5 zip shows that they have come a long way, but the loss of Bundesliga boy Kagawa - who scored some crucial goals for them in this tournament - for the final will certainly be felt.  Though I’m privately hoping that they will still be knackered from the Sth Korea game, players like Endo and Honda were born ready and will no doubt keep our boys busy.

The Blue Samurais are fast and furious on any counter, but the fact that Holger has gone two prongs rather than opt to leave Super Tim going solo up front as Pim did, will give them plenty to worry about. And while the Socceroos no longer have Vinnie Grella to rattle Japan, big Sasa Ognenovski with a three day growth should more than compensate. The Socceroos have also been impressively mobile this Asian Cup and their new found ability to maraud should keep the samurai backline so busy that their tofu curdles and the whole squad turns to miso soup.

Geez, I hope we win.

Vinnie Venezuela